And Daisy Got a Pad and a Pen
Two guys are chatting in class.
Guy 1: So, we might be in the hairdresser’s at the same time?
Guy 2: Yeah
Guy 1: How shall I get my hair cut?
Guy 2: Get it cut long.
Guy 1: How do I get my hair cut long?
Where: Bexhill College
Overheard by: Daisy
An old lady and a teenage girl are sitting in the garden.
Girl: Entertain me!!!
Old lady: You're queer!
Where: Rye
Overheard by: Daisy
A guy and a girl are sitting on a bench in town.
Guy: Well, I asked you out and you said no!
Girl: Well, I told you why! It would be weird cause we’re like, best friends!
Guy: That’s what everyone else I asked said!
Where: Rye
Overheard by: Daisy
An old lady and a girl are walking down the street.
Girl: Who do you think is the most beautiful person in the world?
Old lady: Not you!
Where: Rye
Overheard by: Daisy
Three girls are at the front of the bus, talking to the driver.
(Balding) Driver: I had to wash my hair last night.
Girl 1: Wash your hair?
Girl 2: What do you do? Just scrape your head?
Driver: No! With shampoo and conditioner and everything. My head’s as smooth as a baby’s bum.
Girl 1: Well I’m sure that’s not right. I don’t think babies’ bums have bristles.
Where: Bus to Bexhill
Overheard by: Daisy
A cute girl student and the bus driver have been playfully flirting throughout the journey. There is obvious sexual tension between them.
Driver: What do you think Jeremy would have done if he’d seen me cuddling you?
Girl: I don’t know.
Driver: He probably would have been jealous cause he’d want to cuddle me.
Where: Bus to Bexhill
Overheard by: Daisy
A middle-aged-woman and her teenage daughter are walking through town.
Girl: You make me laugh!
Mother: Do I?
Girl: No.
Where: Rye
Overheard by: Daisy
Two girls a whispering in class.
Girl 1: Have you seen Emma’s hair?
Girl 2: Yeah, it’s tragic isn’t it?
Girl 1: Jake said it looked like a bruise.
Girl 2: Yeah! It does!
Where: Bexhill College
Overheard by: Daisy
Guy 1: Things named after fish are really in right now. Mullets, pikes…
Guy 2: Cats.
Guy 1: Cats?
Guy 2: Yeah, like catfish.
Guy 1: I think you’ll find the fish was named after the cat. Not the other way around.
Guy 2: Oh, right. What about dogfish?
Where: Bexhill College
Overheard by: Daisy
The driver is talking to a girl passenger.
Driver: I’ve never broken a bone in my life! Except for the time when I had an operation on my feet and they had to break all my bones.
Where: Bus to Bexhill
Overheard by: Daisy
I was looking through a magazine with a friend. There was an AIDS campaign advert with different celebs in it.
Me: The poster says “We all have AIDS”. Will Smith doesn’t have AIDS!
Guy: Elton John, yeah, he definitely has AIDS.
Where: Bexhill College
Overheard by: Daisy
A girl walks into class extremely late. She is on her mobile.
Girl on phone: Oh really? Oh, how exiting! What, am I doing it as well? Oh that’s great! Bye! *hangs up* I’m making spaghetti Bolognese tonight!
Where: Bexhill College
Overheard by: Daisy